Online dating is very popular, and many people have their own reason why they love using online dating instead of dating offline, and some people have their own reason why they hate online dating and why online dating is a bad idea and awful. Based on my experience online dating has a good and bad effect to me, there was a time that I felt online dating is not a good idea but, to be honest, online dating has also a positive effect to me and to other people who met their partner through online. Last time I wrote some reason why online dating is good, and now I want to write the opposite reason, why online dating is a bad idea.
Why Online Dating Is a Bad Idea
Way back 2008 I started to join an online dating website, it’s recommended by a friend. She said, ” why don’t you join online dating instead of waiting for your ex-bf to come back, because if he really loves you he will come back to you after a week or a month of cool off, but Gosh, it’s been 1 year now and you still can’t move on, come on girl get your phone and sign up in a dating site”. I did what she advice and I thought online dating will be the answer to my moving on process. But to my surprised online dating has a lot of reason to think why it’s a bad idea, and here are few reasons.
Too many perverts – Many online dating members take advantage women inside dating online site, for them when you joined in a dating site it means you are open-minded and it means your also looking for sex, even though it’s clear to your profile description that you are looking for real relationship but you still can’t avoid encountering pervert daters, they will talk to you nicely at first then ask you to talk on Skype and when you open your camera they will show their nude body or worst their dick right after you open your webcam. It’s so disgusting and can scare women to come back to a dating site again.
Too many Judgmental member – If you want to notice make sure you put your best pictures or else nobody will contact you, I remembered when I just join online dating I uploaded my picture and I can say it’s not the best picture because my friend told me, upload your very nice looking picture if you want to catch their attention, I didn’t follow her advice. Guess what, they just view my profile but no one wanted to talk to me, then after a week I decided to upload my best photo, after approval of dating site to my photo, I got many messages in my inbox. I said to myself, what the heck “I thought judging people to their looks only happens offline”.
You are prone to the scammer – Scammer can take advantage of your weaknesses If they knew that you are desperate to find a serious partner they can pretend that they are the answer to your wish and prayer.
Time-consuming – For you to be able to snare your Mr right or Ms right you have to go online often as you can, and you have to try to talk as many as you can until you finally found the one that matches to your standard.
Most of them are liar – I’m not saying all but most are not true in online dating, let’s admit that it’s really happen in online dating world, do you 100% believed that all of them inside dating site are putting their real pictures in their profile, do you really believed that they are 100% telling the truth to their biography, they can say they are single but the truth is they have kids and wife. They can say they are serious to you but the truth is they just wanted to earn your trust to get what they want and after they get what they want, they can disappear and left you depress and broken-hearted.
Too many desperate members – In dating site, if you encounter liar and judgmental, there is also called desperate people. You can’t blame scammer and liar not to take advantage of you because it’s also your fault, you show them your desperation to find love that’s why they can use it to abuse your desperation, you can’t think and choose the best for you because of your desperation, you must understand that online dating is like a game, you have to be smart for you to win. Being desperate and impulsive can’t make you win the game, instead use your brain before the heart, know some techniques and strategy to win it, you can read a book about dating online secrets rule or ask advice to your trusted friend.
Relationship Don’t Last
The most relationship from dating online don’t last, it won’t last because the relationship is not genuine. You can say I love you online but it doesn’t mean it’s true. It’s easy for them to break up with you because they know they can easily find the new partner in a dating site, there’s a lot of fish inside dating site they will never stick with one fish only unless they decided to stop fishing and felt tired.
Sound Easy But It’s Not
People may think dating online is easy but the truth is, it’s not that easy. Many people get failed using this way to find true love, and they give up because they thought they can easily find lifetime partner inside dating site. I joined dating site 2008 and ended it 2012 because I finally meet my husband after more than 3 years on and off to dating site, but before I’ve met my husband I have encountered different types of people first. You may encounter good and bad daters, if you encounter bad daters it’s easy for you to block them but what if you encounter good daters, do you think you are lucky, as a love seeker I think no, because you don’t know what exactly is his/her intentions to you, unless they tell you that they are serious and wanted to meet you face to face. There is another type of good daters in a dating site they are either just bored and just wanted somebody to talk as a past time or just curious to other members lifestyle and culture but no interest in dating anyone, it means they are talking nice to you but no clue if they want you as a friend or lover. For me, they are all-time waster because I’m looking for a serious relationship, not a friend, and they clearly read in my profile that I am looking for a serious partner, not a friend. As I mentioned earlier, dating online is time-consuming, you need to go online as much as you can for you to catch a goldfish, you need to take a risk but smart when talking to anyone online.
No guarantee of success
Some online daters are lucky but some are not, it means there is no guarantee of success in the online dating world. I can say I’m lucky because I found my husband through online. Other member found their true love online in just 1 month other found after so many years. If you join online dating you must be prepared, don’t take it so serious until you find what you looking for. Because if you take it so serious, you might get hurt, depress and disappointed when other daters rejected you. You also have to understand that the success of others might not be your success, people have their own fate. If your soulmate is not in the online world you cannot find him/her there no matter how hard you try. I can also suggest don’t stop looking offline even if you are a member of a dating online site, if you are still failed online and offline, you might take a rest and focus to your own life then come back dating again when you feel ready.
God is good, he will give what you want at the right time, all he wants you to do is fight and don’t lose hope. In my more than 3 years on and off to online dating I can say at first it’s fun but as time goes by I realized online dating is not for me, I go online maybe once a month and sometimes after 3 months because I felt tired talking to strangers, so I decided to delete my account to the dating site, but guess what, the day that I was going to delete my account I got an email from my husband, I felt something different and I felt that he is a serious man, I felt that I need to reply to his message and change my mind to delete my account today. Then after 2 weeks of conversation on a dating site, we decided to continue our conversation to our personal email account and Facebook. Then after more than 2 months of getting to know each other, he decided to meet me in person to know me better and meet my family, we are happily married now with the very pretty and smart 4-year-old daughter. But I also know some people without success in online dating.
Can lead to marriage but end up divorce
People are lucky if their relationship from online lead to marriage but before you marry your partner from online dating make sure you are ready to take responsibility. Remember that you just met online and you have no idea what are his/her attitude. Meeting once in person is not enough, you need to know each other better before you decide to get married, I can say meeting once in person and next step is marriage right away is not a good idea in some reason and this kind of scenario most happened to a relationship from the international dating site. They cannot get a chance to have another meeting to know each other more because of distance, that is why they usually decided to get married in just one meeting. Many can survive as husband and wife after the wedding, but unfortunately some couples are ended up to divorce because after a couple of months they realized they really don’t love each other or they are having a difficult time to adjust for each other attitude or they realized that they are not yet ready to build own family, too bad but it happens but we cannot blame them because they are in love and willing to take a risk. And sometimes they married a wrong person, for example, the person they married are a gold digger or a cheater, gambler, alcoholic etc. We cannot blame anybody to marry a wrong person actually it happens even people met online or offline and we will just find out the true color of the person we marry once we live together and I can’t say when it’s too late because you still have the right to get rid of her/him to your life once you prove that you marry a wrong person, I know it’s not easy to do especially if you love the person. So be very smart and vigilant about finding your soulmate online, don’t rush things to marry somebody from online, spend time to get to know each other as much as you can.
Online or offline has a bad and good effect on people, no matter what way you choose always remember to do what is best and don’t ever try to fool anyone. Give love and you will receive love, at the right time in the right place. Just keep the faith and never give up.
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